God and Hagar

Genesis 16

Abram has received God's promise about his descendants being as numerous as the dust and the stars, and has seen Yahweh enter into covenant regarding the promise of the land.  Now, sometime later, Sarai gets impatient and decides to intervene since God's plan is not working.  She gives her maid, Hagar, to Abram as his wife.  Once Hagar is pregnant, she gets all up in Sarai's business about it.

This, of course, is all Abram's fault.

Once Sarai gets permission from Abram to "do to her [Hagar] what is good in your sight" - Hagar quickly gets enough and flees from this weirdo family.

Now Sarai, Abram’s wife had borne him no children, and she had an Egyptian maid whose name was Hagar. So Sarai said to Abram, “Now behold, the Lord has prevented me from bearing children. Please go in to my maid; perhaps I will obtain children through her.” And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai. 

Dude.

After Abram had lived ten years in the land of Canaan, Abram’s wife Sarai took Hagar the Egyptian, her maid, and gave her to her husband Abram as his wife. He went in to Hagar, and she conceived; and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her sight. And Sarai said to Abram, “May the wrong done me be upon you. I gave my maid into your arms, but when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her sight. May the Lord judge between you and me.” But Abram said to Sarai, “Behold, your maid is in your power; do to her what is good in your sight.” So Sarai treated her harshly, and she fled from her presence.

It's a bit like curbside service, but Hagar has a conversation with God (The Angel of the LORD) about her predicament. But at least someone has engaged God in prayer about this.

Now the angel of the Lord found her by a spring of water in the wilderness, by the spring on the way to Shur. He said, “Hagar, Sarai’s maid, where have you come from and where are you going?”

More rhetorical questions.

And she said, “I am fleeing from the presence of my mistress Sarai.”

Then the angel of the Lord said to her, “Return to your mistress, and submit yourself to her authority.” Moreover, the angel of the Lord said to her, “I will greatly multiply your descendants so that they will be too many to count.”

The angel of the Lord said to her further,

     “Behold, you are with child,

     And you will bear a son;

     And you shall call his name Ishmael,

     Because the Lord has given heed to your affliction.

     “He will be a wild donkey of a man,
     His hand will be against everyone,
     And everyone’s hand will be against him;
     And he will live to the east of all his brothers.”

Then she called the name of the Lord who spoke to her, “You are, oh God, my beholder”; and then she said, “Have I even remained alive here after seeing Him?” Therefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi [The Well of the Living One, my Beholder]; behold, it is between Kadesh and Bered.

So Hagar bore Abram a son; and Abram called the name of his son, whom Hagar bore, Ishmael. Abram was eighty-six years old when Hagar bore Ishmael to him.

So after the prayer/conversation and a new name for God, Hagar comes back to Abram and Sarai later gives birth to a son named Ishmael.  She also has gained (through Abram?) the promise of descendants too numerous to count.

This was not God's perfect will for this situation, but He made provision for Hagar and Ishmael.  There is no mention here of correction or remonstration by God to Abram (or Sarai) about their actions or attitudes.

Abram comes out of this looking like a conflict-avoiding, henpecked, multi-layer wimp.  His "bright line" of spiritual leadership in the household looks more like a spaghetti noodle.  Then, if he was really regarding Hagar as his wife - who would surrender a wife to be abused? 

The "missing" prayer in this chapter should have dealt with strength and endurance to continue following God's will in the face of compromise and an easier path.  It should also have asked for courage to continue in God's will even when your spouse is offering different plans.

Abram heard the word of the Lord, but let it be drowned out by the words of his wife. It didn't settle deeply into his spirit.  He also did not exercise his authority to maintain the course of his home along God's direction.

I think Sarai's actions echo Eve's curse: "...Yet your desire shall be for your husband ..."